Old Age Day by Day December 9, 2013

We had a social Sunday, with a brunch at a friend's house and dinner for our younger daughter's birthday.  There were four kids at the brunch including a 3 week old baby, and a great grandmother who is ninety.  I got to see people I seldom see and meet the baby.  It was super cold for us yesterday, and I ended up wearing my coat inside the house for a while before dinner.  I hope our outside plants survive.  It's supposed to be cold all week, but not quite as cold as yesterday.

Today we're getting our tree and begin the long process of dragging up the boxes of decorations, sorting through, and figuring out what's missing.  My poor husband does all the heavy lifting, and this year, with my bad foot, it will be even worse for him.  But we both like the transformation that gradually occurs, and he's especially keen on the tree.  I forget what I have tucked away, so there are usually pleasant surprises and memories triggered.  I keep all of the old pet stockings, which gives me an opportunity to think fondly of them again.

Old Age Day by Day December 8, 2013

Mostly, in the mornings, I have breakfast, read the paper and then tell my husband we're heading out to check my email in my studio.  "We" means me and my female dog.  She goes with me, checks out her pee mail then heads back in.  If I'm cooking, she's right under my feet.  How is it that our house is divided along gender lines?  The male dog watches sports with my husband, the female dog reads with me. Very strange.

Today we're going to a brunch in honor of a friend's mother's visit.  The mother is 90, and up until now has been living on her own, but now will live in my friend's house.  This woman is delightful, sharp, if melancolic, and I've known her twenty some years.  I'm glad she's agreeing to be taken care of, and I know the weather here, versus the east coast, will enable her to get out more.  My mother died so young, but I have a few close friends with parents in their nineties, and I've seen what a struggle it is to make sure they are safe and respect their independence at the same time.  It's tricky.

I'll be glad to see her again, and enjoy the pleasure of a mom who survived.

Then we're off to a restaurant to celebrate our younger daughter's birthday, which is tomorrow.  Lots of joy today.

Old Age Day by Day Deceember 7, 2013

Whoa!  I have been a shopping whirlwind today!  First I shopped with our daughter for boots and a sewing machine for her birthday, then we hit Target and Bev Mo, then we unloaded at home, and my husband and I went to Trader Joe's and the pet food store.  My mind is wired from my separate lists:  birthday, holiday party, Christmas gifts, dinners,  finishing cards, stocking stuffers etc.  It will all get sorted, as it does every year.

Our daughter took pictures of us and the dogs for our holiday cards.  I'm getting closer and closer to the cards being ready to mail out.  On Monday we're getting the tree, which will set off another flurry of activity.  I love it!

Last night we watched "Red Dust", an excellent BBC film about the truth and reconciliation commission in South Africa in 2000.  Chitel Edjefor and Hilary Swank star in it.  We thought it appropriate after Nelson Mandela's death.  The movie is powerful, beautifully acted and educational.  It asks powerful questions about forgiveness and history. 

Old Age Day by Day December 6, 2013

The dogs were restless last night.  My poor husband had to get up twice with them.  I let him sleep in this morning.  I guess a lifetime of small kids has prepared us perfectly for sleep disruption, and the dogs are continuing our tradition.  Unfortunately.

I'm getting a haircut today, overdue as usual.  Evidently, I first have to have my head look like a virtual typoon, then I get down to business and have the haircutter tame it.  I have boingy hair.

I also have a few errands.  I've bought the away gifts, wrapped them and must head to the post office to send them.  One step at a time!

Then I pick up my friend from radiation, drop her at home and meet another friend for lunch. 

It was supposed to rain today, but the sky is blue and the clouds, wherever they are, passed us by.

It is cold for us:  record low temperatures yesterday.  I wasn't warm enough in my down vest and sweater, so today I'll wear my down jacket.  We haven't had frost though.  Not yet.  This is definitely winter weather.  The setting is right for the holidays.

Old Age Day by Day December 5, 2013

We've been watching Frank Capra films to get us in the mood for the holidays.  "You Can't Take it With You", "Mr Deeds Goes to Town", "Mr Smith Goes to Washington" and the like.  I've seen "It's a Wonderful Life" a few too many times to see it again.  But I like Capra's socialist sentiments.  The other day I was talking to my husband about how he got away with being so left leaning, and he looked him up on the internet.  I was wondering if the McCarthy hearings were the reason he didn't seem to make films after the forties.  It turns out he was a conscientious objector in World War II, and the public turned against him for this and would not watch his movies.  It was highly unfair, because he served as a medic in harm's way in the war, he just refused to shoot people.  But his career was over though he lived many more decades.  His idealism and passion for democracy and the constitution are sorely needed now.

My foster granddaughter and I worked away on her presents then took a break and watched Shirley Temple's "The Little Princess".  She was curious about what the book said, as the versions are different (we had seen Cuaron's nineties version the two weeks before), and I'm going to hunt for the book for her today.  My husband and I debated the pros and cons of each version.  But Shirley Temple's acting was amazing.  She easily carried the whole film.  Where did that talent come from?  It was extraordinary!

Old Age Day by Day December 4, 2013

I addressed my holiday cards yesterday - one step at a time.  Next I will try to get a photo or two chosen, and after that write the notes inside.  I was sitting a long time, in my boot, and somehow the foot really hurt afterward.  I have no idea how to heal this fracture, or maybe it's the weirdness of walking in a boot or walking funny all the time.  I hope I'm not doing something wrong.  Patience, patience.

My husband and I bought the gifts for our granddaughter, who will be here after all on Christmas.  I'm plugging away each day now to get everything done in time.  There is a familiar pleasure in these tasks, and the focus is relaxing.  It helps that I love the season overall:  the music, the pine boughs, the tree, the food, the company.  My mother made the holidays special, and was as excited as a child herself.  Something must have gone right in her extremely poor childhood, and she could convey delight to us.  She also brought in many friends and family, always had a party before, and thus we were never four people, but many, many more.

Today I have my foster granddaughter, and we will continue making her gifts for her family.  I've got to get more stuffing for pillows before I pick her up. 

Old Age Day by Day December 3, 2013

My friend's visit was very nice, with lots of talk, two movies, eating out a few times, seeing a great art show, and shopping a bit.  It was great to have her around while making the Thanksgiving meal, and our dinner was so delightful, with all of our kids except our daughter-in-law, our older daughter, her husband and the three grandchildren.  We had our close friends and their younger daughter, her boyfriend, and their friend as well.  The meal was a veritable feast, and we lingered a long time.  I even had a bite of walnut pie and apple pie, though I'm not supposed to.  A couple of nights later my husband, friend and I had leftovers and it tasted even better.

It was my friend's birthday on Sunday, and the two of us went to a movie and a nursery to look at Christmas tree ornaments.  Then my husband and I took her out to a fancy place for dinner, and my food was perfection! 

Now I need to get myself in gear for a few immediate tasks and then the long work of a holiday party and Christmas Eve and Day.  We had happy news that our older daughter, her husband, and our granddaughter are coming for a week then.  We're thrilled.  Our grandsons will be with their mother, so we will miss them.

After my friend left yesterday I finished "The Goldfinch" by Donna Tartt.  It's a huge book, and it's taken me a while, but what a stunner.  So beautifully written and gripping, and profound.  I can't recommend it enough.  It's ironic, too, as I'd just seen the painting last summer, and of all the works in the show, I bought a print of that painting, and have had it in my studio to look at ever since.  It is an amazing work of art.  Modern yet timeless, painted in the 1600's.  It's unforgettable.