Old Age Day by Day February 28, 2013

Last day of a short month!  Spring is stepping up to the plate!  And today looks glorious.

My daughter, friend and I had a great time seeing the two installations of Hung Liu, one an amazing gold mountain of fortune cookies, and the other a multilayered enormous mural that had so much for the eye to take in that it was impossible.  Then we heard  her speak.  She's articulate, funny, and awe inspiring.  I bought a book of her show in Beizing, and will also buy the book from the Oakland Museum when that show opens.  I've admired her for many years, and my friend has a painting by her, very lovely.  My daughter got to know her while she was in grad school at Mills, and she had her to her classroom as a guest.  The kids loved her.  She's sixty five and a bundle of high energy enthusiasm.  No slowing down for this older lady!

So I'm excited about her retrospective, and also a new show at the Asian Museum that just opened.  And I want to see the Mauritisius show at the de Young another time as well.  Treasures abound!

Old Age Day by Day February 27, 2013

I ended up not being able to find Parade's End with Benedict Cumberbatch last night on PBS, but watched three hours of a documentary on the feminist movement.  It was great, and brought back a lot of memories.  The movement changed my life.  And it touched on so many issues I was facing:  being a single mother with two kids, finding a name for what happened in my first marriage (battering), the struggle in the workplace over pay, respect, and the sexual harassment, the growing solidarity with other women.  I stepped out of the box of patriarchy and into a wider world, where I could see what really was happening around me.  And it all fit:  Civil Rights, Native American rights, gay rights and women's rights.  I almost cried last night remembering how the ERA got defeated.  I'm still stunned. 

I have my granddaughter this afternoon and then tonight I'm going with my younger daughter and friend to see Hung Liu's exhibit and an interview with her.  She is so inspiring, and a fine feminist icon for all of us. 

Old Age Day by Day February 26, 2013

Oh dread day!  I have my annual checkup.  I've probably gained weight, my blood pressure will be up, the lab tests dire and this time I actually have a complaint about discomfort on my right side.  At my age, the possibilities for bad news are endless.  I'll go, but gee. 

I'm trying to plan to outings in the evening this week, tomorrow and Friday.  I feel awkward, now that I don't drive at night, and I have to overcome my reluctance to ask for help.  It's hard to admit limitations, and feel beholden, as they say.  There will be more of this as I get older. 

I'm going to watch the PBS show about feminists tonight.  It should be interesting.  So much of my life has been about consciousness raising groups and feminist activities.  The movement directed and uplifted my life and writing and teaching.  It will be good to see the icons again.

Old Age Day by Day February 25, 2013

Well, my husband and I watched the Oscars last night.  It's not nearly as fun as the process leading up to it:  the speculation, the nominations, the politics.  My choice for best film never wins, and last night was no different, even though I would have been happy with Lincoln, Life of Pi or Amour.  Thank goodness they didn't go completely crazy and gave Daniel Day-Lewis the award for best actor.  And he had the best speech by far.  But Jennifer Lawrence over Emmanuelle Riva and Jessica Chastain?  And Anne Hathaway over Sally Field and Amy Adams?  Come on.  I'm sure Christopher Waltz deserved his.  And Michael Haneke for his original screenplay.  But Tony Kushner should have gotten adapted.  At least Life of Pi got cinematogaphy.  Argo is a super intertaining film, but it is inaccurate historically and has a little bit of humor, history and drama stirred in a broth that Hollywood likes.  They want to stay away from either truth telling, as in Zero Dark Thirty or Lincoln, and especially from deep issues as in Life of Pi or Amour.

Anyway, I mainly watch it for the dresses, and there were many lovely ones.  I thought Salma Hayek,  Amy Adams, Charlise Theron and Anne Hathaway looked gorgeous, but many more did as well.  Jennifer Lawrence fell on her dress, so perhaps that was not the wisest choice.  Speaking of wisest choices, Meryl Streep again managed to find a dress that was unbelievably hideous and made her look hippy.  She has a knack for bad dressing.  Charlise Theron and Channing Tatum dancing, Shirley Bassey and Barbara Streisland and Adele singing, were delightful.  I thought Seth Mac Farlane was inane, and Paul Rudd and Melissa McCarthy seemed drugged, but most presenters were fine.

We watched the show while eating crispy chicken tacos and drinking beer, and were relieved when it was all over.  There were three, at least, masterpieces this year:  Lincoln, Life of Pi and Amour, and I'm willing to add The Master and Zero Dark Thirty, though I haven't seen it.  But no, we have another Crash, which nobody will see twice.  Strange world down there in SoCal.  Oh, well.

Old Age Day by Day February 24, 2013

I'm going to meditation this morning, and had study group yesterday, and finished a Buddhist book last night by Adyashanti.  So I feel kind of like my strings have been tuned and my guitar is humming.  The more the study group focuses on Shantideva's chapter on patience, the more I see the ways in which I get impatient, and try to push myself to "sum up" or categorize or label, instead of staying with "Don't know".  I am attempting to sit with contradictory feelings without needing to come to resolution, which always leaves things out.  Thus I've had more times recently when I cry and then have a moment of laughter and move on.  I'm not clinging to a feeling, and I'm not pushing a feeling away.  That's progress.

Maybe in an essay I need to indicate broad trends and have points of argument, but in real life it can just be messy.  Really messy. 

Old Age Day by Day February 23m 2013

I was cooking a new recipe, a turkey/sweet potato/chili soup, and had peppers laid out, chopped up, ready to go.  I locked the dogs outside while I checked my email, and when I returned, the door was open and most of the peppers gone.  My husband had let them in, not noticing food on the counter.  The result:  $175 worth of stomach pumping.  It turned out to be an expensive soup.  Only the male and eaten them, but we didn't know that, so off to the vet they went, to return later guilty but innocent.  After all, labs are canine goats.  So we had a lot of excitement around here, and incidentally, the soup was delicious.  It's ironic, because I had been so careful to wash my hands again and again, not touch my face or eyes, not get any seeds anywhere.  But those sneaky dogs outwitted me. 

So no dinner for the dogs.  They seem fine today.  I'm off to my Buddhist study group, and then maybe some shopping.  It is another beautifully sunny day, and I hope to take a nice walk this afternoon.

Old Age Day by Day February 22, 2013

I had my double art day yesterday.  Delightful!  Today I'm seeing two dear friends and tomorrow is my study group, so I'm a happy camper.  I am also going to the store to get some ingredients to make a turkey-sweet potato soup, with chilis, and it sounds like a winner.  my friend from out of town is coming for dinner, and so I have some incentive to cook wisely and well.  Actually, I always cook wisely, in the sense of healthily, but often it is by rote.  I get bored easily by my repetoire.  What can I say, deja vu all over again.  I'm actually old enough to have been a fan of Yogi Berra while he was playing.

Which reminds me - there is a reason to read the sports section again, because the As are gearing up and there are articles on the players and before you know it, the season will open.  Ahhhhhhh.

Also, I've given away a couple hundred more books, and to a good cause, and my bookshelves are more organized and dust free for the moment and it gives me a feeling of accomplishment.  Almost any old thing can give you pleasure if you let it.  Let it.