Old Age Day by Day May 31, 2013

Oh, my goodness, it's the last day of May!  My jury duty finished last night, so I'm free!  Now to get all prepared for the wedding and visits of my cousin and his wife and our older two kids' half brother.  We leave a week from Monday.  Jury duty is exhausting and so difficult, since you know you don't have all the evidence and really none of the history of the individual, and your decision is going to affect another's life in a major way.  I don't like sitting in judgment on someone else.  But following the law and the judge's instructions, we found the defendant guilty on both counts.    Now we have to live with that, and realize that there but for the grace of god go I.  I was so impressed with the court, the judge, and my fellow jurors, who were well educated, intelligent, and sane, pleasant, respectful people.  They gave it their all.  We did our best.

It's supposed to be super warm this weekend, and I hope to be out to enjoy it.  It sure beats a courtroom with no windows, and a jury room that feels like a closet!

Old Age Day by Day May 27, 2013

We've had a very nice long weekend so far.  There was a delightful citizenship party on Saturday, and we saw some friends we hadn't seen in quite a while, and the weather was good enough to be outside the whole afternoon.  Sunday night we had dinner at friends.  Great conversation and food, and at the end we went outside and saw the triangular alignment of Jupiter, Venus and Mercury crystal clear and seemingly very near in the night sky.  Today it's a bit of sweeping, and relaxing.

My big goal today is to buy lipstick, as I lost my favorite tube last week.  That is the only cosmetic I wear, but psychologically, I need it.

We were also happy to hear our daughter-in-law has a teaching job in a 5th grade classroom for next year.  All round, a lovely weekend.

Old Age Day by Day May 25, 2013

Today is a party for a friend who has just become a citizen, after living in this country for many years.  I'm happy for her, and it marks a big transition for her beyond citizenship, as her mother just died, and though she still has family in her home country, her husband and grown kids are firmly rooted here.  What a rich life she's had, with different cultures and languages expanding her world.  And that multiplicity has enriched all of her friends as well.  It's a great reason for a celebration.

I'm kind of relieved to be at home instead of the cabin.  On the one hand, I like to help "officially" open the summer season, on the other hand, the traffic going up and back and the sudden crowdedness of a place that has been quiet for nine months is disconcerting.  I'll be up soon, but maybe not until after our daughter's wedding, at the rate I am going.

Memorial day seems especially poignant this year, with the bombings, attacks, tornados and other shocking violence.  Death does not always come gently, as we've seen.  It takes in the wrong order, and brutally, and without reason. 

Old Age Day by Day May 24, 2013

Well, my lucky earrings didn't help with jury duty.  Neither did claiming hardship because of my daughter's upcoming wedding.  I still don't know if I'm on the jury, as they didn't finish selecting, and the judge canceled today and we have to come back Tuesday morning.  I should know sometime that day if I'm selected.  If I am, it's a DUI and should take four or five days.  I can handle it, I'd just rather not, but then that's true of everybody.  I liked the judge, and the panel, those I talked to, are intelligent and decent, so it's not so bad.  There is no victim or accident, so that is less stressful.  I can do this.  I have my biases, but everybody does, and I will make a full effort to overcome them.  And hey, I'll make a whopping $9 a day!

I was so exhausted when I got home, because listening to all the instructions and the multitude of questions brings up so much.  Being in court brings up my divorce and my time in the DA's office in Victim Assistance, plus being subpeoned when I worked in safehouses.  A lot of water under the bridge.  I've had bad experiences with police officers and courts and good experiences.  I'm skeptical and not trusting, but yesterday, I thought that it was a pretty good group of jurors.  I believed that they would try hard to be fair.  Yesterday it seemed like a pretty decent system of justice.

Now I have four days to do other things, and I'll make the most of them.  A party, a dinner, a movie and my granddaughter's play.  All joyous events. 

Old Age Day by Day May 22, 2013

I'm still waiting to go in to the courthouse and get my dismissal from jury duty.  What a pain.  I thought I'd get there sooner.  I'm going to try to talk to them on the phone today.  I'm so sick of being on call.  I know that makes me a crummy citizen, but it is so.
I'm taking my granddaughter to shop for a dress for her piano recital.  She is growing up so fast, and again wants me to drop her home early so she can play with the girls across the street.  I may just ease out of this arrangement for the rest of this school year, and see her only occasionally, for something special like a movie.  Her world is so happily and fully populated, and her need for me so much less, with all her new family. 
Yesterday I sprayed the outdoor furniture, and my spray finger went numb for a couple of hours.  I tried to write and couldn't, it was so shaky.  But I'm glad of completing that little task.  It's satisfying.  I'll see what deeds I can get done today.

Old Age Day by Day May 21m 2013

I don't watch TV, so I woke up this morning to the newspapers and the devastation in Oklahoma City.  I cannot even imagine being in the middle of such a storm.  My family is from the midwest, so I had my time in basements and storm shelters, but that was a long time ago now.  I heard stories from relatives and especially vivid was my grandmother telling of the time a tornado hit the state fair and her seeing a ferris wheel flung across the sky with people still in the seats.  When we see what nature can do, why is it that we add to our suffering by deliberate acts of violence?  There is enough randomness in the world that we need not mirror it in our behavior.  But, of course, such acts are not rational, they are deformed minds bringing down others with them. 

I pray that more people alive are found, that those who survived are comforted and sheltered, and that they have the courage to rebuild their lives.

Old Age Day by Day May 20, 2013

I've returned home from my little overnight trip.  I had a great time seeing my daughter-in-law's concert, having Indian food out, talking and watching an Indian movie with Shakur Khan.  This morning we went out for breakfast before I left.  It was a good outing, but I stayed up until midnight and didn't get to sleep right away, so I didn't call the courthouse at 10:30 am.  I'll call this afternoon at 3:30.  It's warm and beautiful and I may take a nap and then have a walk after.  I hope my husband is having as good a time at the cabin as I am here.