Old Age Day by Day October 31, 2013

Well, I set out yesterday to get some exercise, and decided to go with my husband to the reservoir to walk the dogs.  I did not change out of my dansko shoes, and sure enough, I fell on the uneven pavement.  I thought I could walk out the pain, but by the end of the almost 3 mile walk, I knew I needed ice, and badly.  After looking at my right foot after we returned, my husband thought I should call our doctor, so I got an appointment and lay in the sunroom for three hours with my foot up, icing it.  The doctor then looked at it, sent me for Xrays, and lo and behold, I fractured my fifth metatarsal bone.  I have to see a podiatrist, but no one answered, and we'll see if I get a call back, or end up waiting until next week.  Doctors these days often work only four days with big lunch breaks and close by 4 pm.  My foot feels okay just sitting, but I have to hobble a bit, and have had to cancel everything for the next couple of days.  I usually am so good at changing to the appropriate shoes, and I have twisted my foot a dozen times before in danskos, so I know better.  I was just in a rush and not thinking.

Well, I guess I'll be reading a lot.  Just to top off yesterday's fiasco, we watched the sad end of the Cards hopes for the World Series, with them outclassed in every way and looking like they'd already given up all hope.  Nobody even tried to really run to first base.  So the best team did win, and it wasn't ours.  Oh, well, time to concentrate on the A's again.

Happy Halloween!  I missed seeing my foster granddaughter because of my fall, and now she won't get her goodies until next week.  She's going as a fifties ponytailed girl.  My granddaughter up north is going as a snow princess.  I wish I could see them!

Old Age Day by Day October 30, 2013

I was in the car way too much yesterday and near the end of it there was an accident right in front of me, as I was stopped waiting for a light to turn green in a long line of cars.  A woman came from my right, and barreled through the intersection, hitting a car coming from the opposite direction from me.  I was boxed in, with no time to honk or move out of the way, but she missed me and smashed the other car.  I was stunned driving the rest of the way home.  I keep seeing such scary driving, and most of us are trying to be calm and defense, but with impulsive drivers that hardly matters.  I had a long talk with my husband about whether I should have stopped, but there was nowhere to pull over until after I'd crossed the wide intersection, I didn't have any special skills or abilities, and there were no police.  Nowadays, there is no reason for witnesses, as the drivers are expected to take care of everything themselves, unless there are injuries.  When I got hit from behind, there were cars all around and everyone just went right on by and left us to ourselves in the middle of the street.  And then there is the fear of being in the middle of road rage, and someone pulling a gun.  Driving is pretty scary these days.  And what is the rush?

Last night we watched Jurassic Park, which seemed a little bit like the accident, with cars getting knocked over and chased by T Rexes.  It's a jungle out there.

Old Age Day by Day October 29, 2013

Oh, dear.  The Cards lost and did not look good.  However, I'm proud of them for pitching to Dave Ortiz, and not just walking him.  That takes guts.  Again, the game was super tense, but the Cards are not hitting well, Lester or no Lester.  Can I stand to watch tonight?  I hope so. 

I'm very excited my best friend is coming for Thanksgiving.  We will have a lot of fun together.  We always do.  I'm going to make a list of things to see and do.  It will also be her birthday, so something special is in order.  There are some great art shows around, and we could go to wine country.  Hummm.  This is going to be fun.

I am taking an older friend for her check up after eye surgery today.  I have to go north, then swing back around and head east.  Her seat must be reclined while I drive.  I'm a bit nervous, but happy to help her out.  She is an amazing, bouncy, dynamic woman.  And she has had some health setbacks that would have discouraged a lesser being.  She was my younger daughter's kindergarten and first grade teacher and now my daughter teaches that age kids.  Karma!

Old Age Day by Day October 28, 2013

My younger daughter and I went to a tea and fashion show for Breast Cancer research, and we had a delightful time.  There were little sandwiches (chicken pesto, brie and apple or salmon) and pastries (choc coissants, cheese danish, brownie somethings, strawberry tarts) and champagne and tea.  The models were seven feet tall plus 8 inch heels, but the clothes were simple and lovely.  We had a great time, and had shopped a bit before, so it was a girly, girly afternoon.  I thought of our daughter and her treatment, and felt teary.  So many women going through this scary disease, hoping for remission and fearing bad luck. 

When we watched the World Series game, it was Stand Up for Cancer day, and people held cards with the names of family or friends who had died of cancer or who were struggling with fighting it.  That gesture really touched me as well.  They raised 6 million dollars at the game.  And all of the players on both teams held up cards.  Everyone has been touched by this disease. 

My team lost last night, in a totally frustrating game, but it was tight and exciting every second of the way, and had another dramatic ending, with our guy trying to steal base and getting tagged out.  Game over, as suddenly as the night before.  It looks like this series is going down to the wire.

Old Age Day by Day October 27, 2013

I tried my new waffle maker this morning and it worked really well.  The waffles were light and fluffy.  Waffles were a Sunday night tradition in my family.  My dad made them and sausage or bacon or both, and we all felt it was a big treat and fun to not have "dinner".  My dad was quite a breakfast maker in general, with huge breakfasts to start my brother and I off in the morning.  He would make cream of wheat, add half and half and canned fruit cocktail, then toast and maybe eggs as well.  On the weekends my mom would make biscuits and gravy, and my dad would pile on fried eggs and canadian bacon and cantaloupe and orange juice with a cherry in the glass.   We sometimes had half a grapefruit, or stewed prunes or applesauce.  It's a miracle I could walk to school after breakfast. 

I, of course, didn't appreciate the heavy stuff, and wished I could just have fruit and maybe a piece of toast.  I hated eggs, from the beginning, as it seemed like killing baby chicks and the meats bothered me as much.  I'd seen the animals slaughtered, hung out and cured at my grandma's place, and I was not to be fooled.  But I did occasionally like pancakes or waffles.  Now I don't even like pancakes, though I don't turn down crepes, but when I order in restaurant it's oatmeal and fruit, or scrambled eggs and toast.  But I have my husband representing my midwestern family, and eating as if he were my dad.  Today I had meatless sausage patties with the waffles, and my poor husband had to grin and bear it.  Those who don't cook don't get to decide the menu.

How about that game last night?  That was almost too exciting, and the finale, with Craig getting the run due to obstruction, will be talked about for ages.  I just hope he didn't get reinjured, as he'd just come off the disabled list.  And I really hope that wasn't part of the plan by the obstructor, who shall remain nameless.  So far this world series has been super exciting.  It's mighty satisfying.

Old Age Day by Day October 26, 2013

At my Buddhist study group this morning, we mostly avoided the subject of patience in Shantideva's The Way of the Bodhisatva.  We have been on this chapter for years, so I'd say we win the award for patience in a certain respect, but perhaps this causes us to occasionally, as this morning, ramble on about tangential topics and only rarely manage to tack on the patience theme to what is being discussed.  Were we tired?  Was there an elephant in the room that no one wanted to see?  I cannot know.  For my own part I was tired from my trip and just returning home.  However, I managed to briefly discuss two issues that I thought were right on target, only there was no enthusiasm from the teacher or others about the aspects of patience I thought these examples made obvious.  Sometimes the patience is in not expecting profundity or insight at every turn.  At the least, my mind was stirred in a helpful direction by my noting the meandering nature of the discussion, the lack of focus, my desire to control and direct us back to the topic (utterly hopeless - I need to mind my own mindstream) and my judgment in silently deciding this time was not well spent (who knows what the others thought?). 

Of course, these fellow students and I have known each other for over twenty years, so just being in their presence is valuable.  We are on the same path, we know each other's habits of mind and our histories, we trust each other implicitly.  We also bore each other at times.  It does not discourage us from showing up at great effort each month, and physically being in the same room has a power beyond whatever we discuss.  We are supporting each other.  We trust each other.  We have utter patience with the group process, whatever the particular outcome is on a particular day.  So I am grateful for the group, the falliable, utterly human group that we are.

Old Age Day by Day October 25, 2013

We were gratified the Cardinals won last night, and it was a tense, exciting game.  So the next games will be in St. Louis, which will hopefully help the Cards.  My family is from Missouri, so that's why I'm rooting for them.  Boston is too east coast strange for me.  I'm a westerner and midwesterner through and through.  I read an article about how there should be more razzle-dazzle in the games - more belting homers and drama.  I totally disagree.  This is baseball at its best:  closely matched teams, brilliant pitching, so that all the "little" things show up - a catch near the dirt, a swift play, a small hit that advances the teammate.  The commentator should watch football players crashing into each other and injuring themselves or basketball's hyperactivity.  Baseball and soccer are about rhythmn and serendipity and luck.  The whole mysterious game of chance and change and will and powerlessness.  Brute force doesn't win games in baseball.  The fates control what the players can't will to happen.  A great player has an off night, a newbie becomes a star, a bunt saves the day.  I adore baseball.  Like life, it is surprising and changing constantly and joyous in its exuberance.