I'm going to a tea party today. I am noticing, as my friends and I get older, that we like to do again the things we did when young: the zoo, art play, games, singing, gluing (collages are big) and tea parties. There is an appreciation for the simple activities that once brought us together with friends when we were children, without the corkage fee or potluck burden. There is nothing to prove any more. If you can't remember when I used to cook, oh well, think what you will of me. Yes, the symphony is always nice, but it might be even better to sit in the back yard and giggle. I feel I've shored up all these wonderful operas, plays and recitals, but I'm slightly bored with my role as the audience, and want to be active in my entertainment again. Let's face it, I've seen Madama Butterfly and listened to Vivaldi many times, and I can sit in a plumpy chair and recall the experience while saving money at the same time.
Tea is a celebration. And if I often don't approach it with the delicacy of the Japanese Tea Ceremony, I love "doing it right". Real china cups and saucers, cream, sugar cubes or crystals, the tiny sandwiches and sweets. Tea is served, and forges a connection between the participants. My friend wants to offer me something, and I want to accept it with graciousness and attention. This is always a good lesson for me, as I am one of those people who loves to give but is uncomfortable accepting gifts. I've taken all of the equations out of my mind by now I hope, and no longer worry about who did what for whom last. You can "do for me" anytime now, and I can thank you with dignity and gratitude.
So are little children practicing something secretly profound? My tiny granddaughter and I play tea and have since she was under a year old. She took the tea set I bought her with her to her new home. She likes to serve me, and for me to exclaim how "delicious" it is. We are perhaps practicing a rite that will mark us as connected in our hearts and souls. And you can never practice too much.
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