Old Age Day by Day March 16,2010

I just received a video of our granddaughter singing. We miss her so much; it is delightful to have this great technology that can keep us connected. And when I see her, I remember my mother telling me that I sang "Candy Kisses" (whatever that song is) and threw Hersey's kisses to the audience when I was two. She also loved to relay the information about me coming up to strangers on a bus and asking if they wanted to see me sing and dance. I still have that aspect to my nature, and have recently allowed myself to get back to "showing off" a bit. When you're young it's considered adorable, but later you can be made to feel embarassed, as if you're grasping for undeserved limelight. I let that kind of thinking rule me for decades, but I now permit myself to belt out songs, sing as I walk the dogs, take voice lessons and I'm about to sing in a choir. We should feel just as dellighted when we see a grown up singing for joy as we do a child.

In my old age, I no longer care about what "they" think of me. I feel I only need to check my own motivation, and make certain it is not harmful to others. My passion about this right now comes partly from seeing these old musicals (I bought a boxed set) with Jane Powell and Debbie Reynolds when they were teenagers, or close to it. They were kind of the Deanna Durbins of the late forties and early fifties, and their playful fun keeps me watching some pretty dumb plots and actor's lines. Everybody loved Shirley Temple until she became a teenager, but Jane Powell and Debbie Reynolds arrived as teenagers and then lost their power later, mainly due to the demise of musicals. That's why people love Mamma Mia and Tony and Tina's Wedding and sing alongs of the Sound of Music. Our voices have been silenced and we need that outlet. If a person has stopped attending church, ask them what they miss most and they say "the singing". We're all fools during Christmas carol season, and who doesn't sing at a ball game.

I'm glad I'm recovering some of the joy I lost after school choruses and church choir was behind me. If you see me tap dancing down the street with two labs or wonder if I'm talking to myself, don't call the police. I'm fine, I'm feeling great, and I'm SINGING to myself.